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Sex Secrets Women Wish You Knew (Part 2)

Part 1 can be found here 7.   Club Orgasm Isn't "Members Only" Only one in five women we surveyed said their last orga...


Part 1 can be found here


7. Club Orgasm Isn't "Members Only"

Only one in five women we surveyed said their last orgasm came during penetration. "Most younger women want their partners to slow down and use their hands and mouths more," explains Juliet Richters, Ph. D., an Australian sex researcher who surveyed more than 19,000 people for her book Doing It Down Under.
In her survey, more than 90 percent of women were able to reach orgasm when their partners used only oral and manual stimulation. Here's the rub: Fifty-two percent of the women we surveyed said they've made a guy stop because they were afraid of taking too long.
So how can you be sure she's not letting you off easy? "Say 'I love doing this, I could do this all day. Are you sure you want me to stop?' " Whipple says.
If you're the one worried about 20-plus minutes of exhausting tongue-lapping, though, "don't go faster—it won't make her reach orgasm sooner," Cox says. "If anything, slow down. The gentler and slower and more consistent you are, the quicker she'll arrive."
Another option: Enlist help. A small vibrator on her clitoris and your moist lips everywhere else should do the job.

8. Don't End Quickies With "Thanks!"

Only half of all women can reach orgasm when sex lasts 10 minutes or less, according to a 2009 study published in the Journal of Sexual Medicine. "That means during a quickie, you'll probably finish and she won't," says Levkoff.
If she doesn't orgasm, make sure you'll have access to future rapid-fire sessions by saying, "Later tonight, it's going to be all about you."
Then follow through on that promise. Leave her hanging too many times, and she won't stick around for long.

9. The G-Spot Has Friends. Find Them

You're goal-oriented. Good.
But the G-spot and the clitoris aren't the only bull's-eyes.
"The most recent anatomical research suggests that the clitoris is perhaps better described as the 'clitoral complex,' where the vagina, urethra, and clitoris all function as a unit rather than as individual parts," explains Kinsey Institute researcher and Men's Health columnist Debby Herbenick, Ph. D.
Try working that clitoral complex by hitting multiple hot spots at once. Some researchers believe there's something called an A-spot, located far inside the vagina on the side closest to her belly button.
"Stroke this spot and she'll lubricate almost instantly," Cox says. "Put one lubed finger into her vagina as far as it will comfortably go. Use the whole length of your finger to explore the front wall of her vagina."
Now triple the sensation: Stick both index and middle finger inside her, and stick out your thumb like you're hitchhiking. It'll pull your fingers more snugly against her vaginal walls, stimulating both A-spot and G-spot simultaneously.
Then use your thumb to also stimulate her clitoris, and gently twist your hand.

10. "Ready" Is All Relative

"Just because a woman is lubricated doesn't mean she's ready for sex," says Richters.
Your woman's real prime time comes once she reaches a phase of arousal called "uterine tenting."
It's just like it sounds: The uterus backs out of the way and the vagina grows in length by as much as an inch.
"You'll experience deeper penetration, and the vagina will provide an intense grip to the head of your penis," says Barbara Keesling, Ph. D., a lecturer on human sexuality at California State University at Fullerton and the author of Men in Bed. "The orgasms are incredible."
Keesling says the best position is the butterfly: "Have her lie on her back and pull her knees up to her shoulders, tilting her pelvis so her vagina points up almost to the ceiling," she says.

ince tenting can take anywhere from 30 seconds to, well, forever, focus on synchronizing the stimulation between your penis and her outer lips before entering her.
Lie pressed against each other with your penis snug between her legs, allowing her to slide and rub against you while you use your hands and mouth elsewhere. The warm, slick, and firm contact will bring her to a boil in no time.

11. Want to Have Sex? Do the Dishes

"If a woman is distracted by anything—work, lack of sleep, chores, a fight she had with a friend—it can interfere with her arousal," says Whipple.
Seven in 10 women we surveyed said helping around the home was a turn-on, but men do only about 30 percent of the chores, according to the Council on Contemporary Families.
The women we surveyed said they'd be most grateful if you did thedishes, cooked dinner, and did the laundry, in that order.
Score bonus points: Don't brag.

12. Don't Make Orgasm Your Only Goal

Desperation sinks her sex drive: A 2008 study published in the Journal ofSexual Medicine found that stress about sexual performance significantly decreases female arousal.
"Whatever you do, don't look up and ask, 'Are you close?' or 'Did you come?'" Whipple says. "It's distracting, and it adds unnecessary pressure."
See if you're on the right track by asking questions such as, "Do you like that?" and "Should I keep doing that?" instead.
And if you're waiting for her to reach orgasm during penetration, it's sometimes better to finish first, rather than holding out for half an hour.
"Women don't have orgasms every time, and they know it's not necessarily their partner's fault," Whipple says.
So take turns, Levkoff says. "You can always go back and use your hands and fingers to please her, if she's still turned on."
Source: http://www.menshealth.com/

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Man & Woman: Sex Secrets Women Wish You Knew (Part 2)
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